my ear has a problem.

the other day i tripped, fell and hit my face on a wall putting a nice little gash in my forehead. the wall was ok.   I was visiting friends last sunday afternoon and one of them came to help me clean up and poured what he thought was water on my head.

It wasn’t water, but kerosene. fortunately the bleeding stopped, but it burned like #$@%#@. some of it also got in my ear. that was the worse part. I could deal with the hit on the head, a nice cut and a little bit of what I assume is whiplash. but the kerosene in the ear was more then I could handle. the pain was very intense.

today is thursday. my ear is still blocked up. up until yesterday morning I still had kerosene coming out of the ear. i think what is remaining is water and wax. or maybe more kerosene. whatever it is, it doesn’t want to come out and is driving me crazy.

i’m getting very tired of juba. i’m doing work but there is no money coming in. am trying my hand at some business venture, but they are not going over very well. my family is back in Nairobi. i havn’t seen them for the last three and half months. my newborn won’t have an idea who I am when I see him again. I fear my other son is forgetting me too.

i just want to leave. but i have to keep looking, searching, hoping that i will find myself bringing in the money i need to support my family. sometimes just seems like it isn’t going to happen.